


sleepover time!

by florafae



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: (hi oz), Alternate Universe - Character Swap, Baking, M/M, Rated T for some cussing, Sleepovers, adhd melanie, also not relevant but again its there, autistic gerry, i write for me and my one friend that actually knows about the swap au, is the lack of caps and punctuation laziness? yeah maybe, thats not super relevant but its There, theyre all just best friends man, theyre all trans, tma swap au babey!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:42:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25657618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/florafae/pseuds/florafae
Summary: melanie invites the archives crew over for a sleepover! at 2am. because theyre all awake,so why not?
Relationships: Gerard Keay & Melanie King, Gerard Keay & Michael Shelley, Gerard Keay/Tim Stoker, Melanie King & Tim Stoker, and melanie teases them about it, the timgerry is like. pre relationship, theyre pining - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	sleepover time!

**Author's Note:**

> this fic is part of me and some friends archivist gerry au!!! :-] its completely self indulgent,yknow,like all my fics,

**hot assistant summer:** In the Archives by myself…...Bored……..😒😒

**knife wife:** oh my god. youre so dramatic

**white bread:** Im so sorry king :(

**hot assistant summer:** See Melanie?Maybe if you were more like Michael!!Now I'm going to passionately make out with him,because he cares about me.

**white bread:** 😳😳😳

**knife wife:** lmao i thought you had a crush on [redacted] though

**hot assistant summer:** SHUT THE FUCK UP

**hot assistant summer:** LITERALLYNBFJ SHUT UP🔫🔫🔫🔫 DON'T TEST ME

**gerard way:** okay first off no making out in the archives

**white bread:** Coward

**hot assistant summer:** Sigh…...If only someone would hang out with me...All alone…...In the Archives……….Lonely…….🙄🙄🙄🙄

**knife wife:** again. dramatic.

**hot assistant summer:** Fuck off💔💔

**knife wife:** do you wanna go to gerrys house?

**gerard way:** are you just. inviting yourself into my home????

**knife wife:** yeah

**gerard way:** god damn okay

**hot assistant summer:** Omg please

**hot assistant summer:** Gerry can we!!Please!!!

**gerard way:** i mean??yeah?sure???but also its 2am why dont you just sleep

**hot assistant summer:** I'm lonely and sad in here I can't sleep 😒😒

**white bread:** Im also coming :)

**hot assistant summer:** FUCK YEAH

**gerard way:** obviously. are you bringing your little bastards?

**white bread:** Idk what you mean gerry,theyre all very polite and nice and kind! Theyve literally done nothing wrong ever. But yes i am

**gerard way:** michael.

**white bread:** Gerry.

**gerard way:** michael your little bastards have caused me more pain than ive ever known. i know you know what im talking about

**white bread:** Its a part of life gerry i dont know what to tell you

**gerard way:** literally no its not

**white bread:** It will be.

**knife wife:** hey,what?huh?whats happening?

**gerard way:** oh im just bullying michaels little long boys

**knife wife:** huh

**gerard way:** his ferrets

**hot assistant summer:** HUH?

**knife wife:** WHAT THE FUCK

**knife wife:** I HATE YOU PEOPLE. FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU

**knife wife:** YOU HAVE FUCKINJ FERRETS AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME

**white bread:** YOU DIDNT ASK!!!

**knife wife:** NO EXCUSES,WHORE

**knife wife:** IM RUNNING AWAY. STARTING A NEW LIFE

**hot assistant summer:** I'm with Melanie HOW have you never showed up these little bastards!!!

**white bread:** Do you. want a picture?????

**knife wife:** .please

**white bread:** [img.]

**hot assistant summer:** AAAAAAAWWWWW

**hot assistant summer:** 💓💓💕💕💓💖💗💗💜💝💝💝💞💞❤️💖💖❣️💗💖💋💋💋💖💕💕💕💖❤️💗💖💝

**hot assistant summer:** ±&&«|¡;8;5;,!,¡5:;4?6'6,

**knife wife:** are you okay

**hot assistant summer:** Am I ever?

**hot assistant summer:** ANYWAYS Michael please bring them I will actually cry. Someone come pick me up I need to see the babies

**knife wife:** ill be by in like ten minutes dont die until then

**hot assistant summer:** No promises😘

**gerard way:** invading my house at 2am….michael is the worst here obviously but still. youre all criminals

**hot assistant summer:** Would you rather me be sad and alone?? 😲

**gerard way:** uuuugh

**hot assistant summer:** That's not a yes so I'll take it!

**gerard way:** for now

**gerard way:** michael are you good to get here on your own?

**white bread:** Yeah!!Just gotta get the babies secured and kiss the wife goodbye

**hot assistant summer:** Wife?

**gerard way:** you dont wanna ask

**white bread:** No he does but still! Ill tell you later!

**hot assistant summer:** Damn! Okay! Well I look forward to hearing about your wife,I guess?

**gerard way:** dont look forward to it. please.

**hot assistant summer:** LFDBVCFVGHDS WELL NOW I'M SCARED

**white bread:** :// Literally im just a normal man with a wife but gerry keeps harassing me

**gerard way:** and ill keep doing it!!!

**white bread:** What are you,heterophobic?

**gerard way:** yeah<3

**white bread:** :/

**white bread:** Anyways everyone shut up im on my way

**hot assistant summer:** Hell fuck yeah

  
  


\---

  
  
  


[melanie and tim show up first. they dont bother knocking,tim just throws the door open and dramatically walks in. melanie (less dramatically) follows him. she walks forward and wraps gerry in a hug.]

**melanie:** hey,asshole.

**gerry:** hey,bitch.

[as soon as she pulls away,tim hugs him,and makes a specific effort to try to pick him up when he does.]

**tim:** hey!!thanks for letting us break in!!

**gerry:** [laughing] not like i couldve stopped you.

**tim:** i mean,yeah,but still!

**melanie:** no,yeah,if you tried to stop us,we still would have come.

**tim:** oh,absolutely. im so bored and lonely.

**gerry:** if youre so bored,do you wanna do something?

**melanie:** [teasing] what,like--

[gerry smacks a hand over her mouth because he knows what shes about to say. she licks his hand to get it off,and laughs at him when he looks disgusted.]

**gerry:** im gonna fucking get you,king. im gonna get you.

**melanie:** you can try,gayboy.

**tim:** hm,no,no,i think gerry is definitely gonna get you.

**melanie:** really??

**tim:** yeah! hes definitely dedicated enough to do it.

**gerry:** its true.

**tim:** and i dont think he would hesitate to do it either.

**gerry:** also true.

**melanie:** i thought you loved me though!

**gerry:** [joking] do i?

[theres a knock on the door,solely because michael cant open it with his ferrets in his arms. gerry opens the door,and michael immediately sets the little bastards free.]

**michael:** hi!!

[tim doesnt say anything,just lays on the floor. the ferrets start crawling on top of him. one walks over his face,and scratches him. he looks like hes going to cry.]

**tim:** [holding back tears] i love them so fucking much.

**michael:** [nodding] as you should.

**gerry:** ..theyre very cute,but also,are you okay?

**tim:** [now covered in scratches] no,but its worth it.

**melanie:** wait,let me get down there--

[she dives down onto the floor,and lays next to tim,picking up one of the ferrets and sitting it on her chest. it immediately tries to crawl inside the arms of her jacket.]

**melanie:** hey!!what are you doing little dude!!

**tim:** hes exploring! oh my god,hes so talented.

**michael:** [nodding] he really is.

[gerry sighs and comes to sit down next to them,and picks up a ferret.]

**gerry:** hi punk. has your dad been treating you well?

**michael:** you know i have!!

**gerry:** presumably. shut up though im talking to my nephew. anyways. [he turns back to look at punk.] have you been okay?do i need to kidnap you?yeah. ill do it. michael can fuck off,youll be my ferret.

**michael:** hey!

**gerry:** this conversation isnt about you!!

**michael:** yes it literally is! dont steal my ferret.

**gerry:** i mean,no promises. he wouldnt even care. right,punk?

[melanie is straight up cackling watching them.]

**melanie:** you sound like a fucking divorced couple fighting for custody.

**tim:** you really do. have either of you been divorced before?this is the attitude of people that have been divorced before.

**gerry:** n--

**michael:** [interrupting him] yes,actually!

**gerry:** ...and who have you divorced?

**michael:** my wife,six times,but its fine!

**tim:** what. the fuck?

**gerry:** dont worry about it.

**tim:** i will,actually??what???

**michael:** okay, _ so _ \--

[gerry lets out his deepest,most despaired sigh yet.]

**michael:** so. my wife.

**melanie:** arent you gay?

**michael:** yes,now be quiet. my wife. my beautiful wife. i met her when we were young. i had such a crush on her. i promised her when we were young that i would marry her,and i wanted to keep that promise. i told her that im gay,but she didnt mind. we still got married,and a few years later,bought a farm. we live such a good life there,we do,just us,the cows and chickens,and our five kids.

**gerry:** and she still doesnt know youre a harlot?

**michael:** no,she can never know.

[melanie is holding her stomach wheezing,while tim just stares at him. i literally cannot describe his expression but he is Distraught.]

**tim:** what the fuck?

**michael:** what?

**tim:** i-- what the fuck.

**gerry:** [nodding] i know. you get used to it.

**tim:** you do?

**gerry:** i mean,no,but you pretend to.

**michael:** [sing-song] you can try,but it wont wooork!

**tim:** thats. so fucking threatening,thank you!

**michael:** youre welcome!

**gerry:** this- i need a distraction,i cant think about michaels wife at 2am. i cant do this.

**michael:** i mean,coward,but what do you wanna do instead?

**gerry:** i dont know,fucking. bake?i want banana bread.

[tim sits up,with one of the ferrets still sitting on top of his head.]

**tim:** nanny. nan bread. b. bananny. yes.

**gerry:** so you wanna help,then?

**tim:** hell yeah i do!

**gerry:** anyone else?

[melanie mumbles something unintelligible from the floor.]

**gerry:** okay,just us,then.

[gerry and tim walk into the kitchen,not even turning any lights on,just making banana bread in the dark at 2am yaknow.]

**gerry:** i dont...remember how to make banana bread.

**tim:** thats fine,we can wing it!

**gerry:** can we?

**tim:** sure we can! we just need,uh..bananas…..and,uh...bread things!

**gerry:** [sarcastic] really great plan you got there.

**tim:** i know,right?so--

[he grabs the bananas from the fridge,and a few mixing bowls. he literally has no idea what hes doing.]

**tim:** i think we need flour. where is your flour?

[gerry reaches up and grabs it from a cabinet]

**gerry:** right here. you sure you got this?

**tim:** totally sure! [he grabs the flour from gerry and pours a random amount into one of the bowls,not bothering to use a measuring cup. a lot of it puffs out in a cloud of flour and onto tims face.]

**gerry:** [trying not to laugh] i think you got a- you- you got a little something right there-

**tim:** you know,i think this flour really just adds to my sexiness,dont you think?

**gerry:** yeah. sure. absolutely. you look even sexier than before.

**tim:** aawww,you thought i was sexy before?

**gerry:** not when you say it like that,no. the flour totally helps. you just need a little….

[he reaches into the bag and grabs a handful,then tosses it onto tim,whos face is completely white now.]

**gerry:** absolutely brilliant.

**tim:** i agree. wouldnt you like to be sexy too?

**gerry:** no,im good ac--

[before he can finish what hes saying,tim claps his flour covered hand onto the top of gerrys head,covering his hair in white. gerry just stands there,blank faced,for a moment.]

**gerry:** tim?

**tim:** yeah?

**gerry:** i hope it was worth it.

[gerry takes the bowl tim had poured flour into,and throws it at tim. most of his body is covered in flour now.]

**tim:** GERRY HOLY SHIT--

**gerry:** was it fucking worth it??

**tim:** yes. yes im very comfortable like this actually.

**gerry:** fucking--

**melanie:** hey,whats-

[tim,startled,grabs a big handful of flour and throws it at her,before realizing who it is and lowering his hand,acting like he didnt just cover her in flour.]

**tim:** oh,hey,melanie!

**gerry:** tim. tim,youve made a mistake.

**tim:** what?

**melanie:** oh,im gonna get your ass,stoker.

**tim:** _ oh no-- _

[tim runs,screaming as loud as he possibly can,absolutely waking up gerrys neighbors. melanie grabs the bag of flour off the counter and runs after him,yelling threats while he screams.]

**michael:** [yelling from the living room] what the fuck is happening!!

**gerry:** i dont knooow.

**michael:** is-- OH YOU ASSHOLE-

[ah. the sound of michael having flour thrown on him. no one is spared from melanies flour induced rage,not even michael,who wasnt even here when this started.]

[gerry peeks into the living room to see michael holding one of his ferrets,pank,very close,and whispering to her.]

**michael:** oh,pank,ill protect you. i wont let them throw flour at you. youre safe. youre-- FUCK-

[hes interrupted by melanie running in a circle around him,trying to catch tim. gerry sighs,and goes back to the kitchen. he was going to get banana bread one way or another,whether these assholes helped him or not.]

[he really doesnt know how to make banana bread,though.]

(imagine a cool banana bread making montage here okay i do remember how but im not writing it here okay mwah love wins)

[melanie and tim walk back into the kitchen,almost completely covered in flour,just as gerrys putting the bread pan in the oven.]

**melanie:** wait,you already made it?that quick?

**gerry:** yes??you guys have been at it for like…..twenty minutes.

**tim:** oh! well. fuck! sorry about your house,by the way,theres a lot of flour.

**gerry:** you people hurt me so deeply. i fucking hate it here. you are all irredeemable criminals and monsters. get out of my house.

**melanie:** aaaww,but you still love us,though?

**gerry:** [deadpan] no.

**tim:** what about me?

**gerry:** …….youre on thin ice.

**melanie:** what?!thats so obviously favoritism.

**gerry:** no,no its not,im being completely fair. maybe youre just evil,and tim is innocent.

**tim:** yeah,melanie,maybe im just innocent!

**melanie:** actually,i think its because you-

**gerry:** haha,oKAY,very funny melanie but thats enough for tonight-

[he turns her around and pushes her out of the kitchen,leaving tim looking confused. michael is still in the living room,half asleep,laying on the couch with his ferrets. gerry leans over the back of it to look at him.]

**gerry:** tired?

**michael:** [tired gibberish]

**gerry:** ah. good talk.

**melanie:** poor michael,hes so worn out and he wasnt even a part of the flour fight,just a bystander. thats a sad life.

**gerry:** i mean,it is,like,3am. maybe he just gets tired at 3am like a normal person.

**tim:** unrealistic! he should go to sleep at 6am like the rest of us!

**gerry:** i-- im so deeply worried for all of you?what?please go to sleep earlier?

**tim:** i love you,but also,no!

**melanie:** yeah,like,look at me. do you think  _ i  _ go to bed at reasonable times?unheard of. your standards for me are too high. i havent gone to sleep before midnight in a month.

**gerry:** melanie?melanie??thats so bad??

**melanie:** no,im sexy,so its okay.

**gerry:** thats not how it works.

**tim:** hm,no,yeah,i think it is. youre sexy,you could stay up late like us!

**gerry:** i--

**tim:** cmon,gerry. youre sexy enough. just do it!!

**melanie:** yeah,cmon gerry.

**gerry:** im already staying up with you assholes! its 3am! its so late! are you fucking- like,are either of you okay?

**melanie and tim:** [in unison] no.

**gerry:** well god damn. good to know i guess.

[tim winks and throws up a peace sign.]

**melanie:** honestly,i dont know what you expected.

**gerry:** i expected better.

**melanie:** you shouldnt!

**gerry:** okay,you little bastard. sit down,grab a ferret,im making you watch a movie or something so youll shut up.

**tim:** OH oh can we watch ponyo?

**melanie:** ponyo?

**tim:** yeah?are you gonna be a fucking man and watch ponyo with me?huh?

**melanie:** _ obviously.  _ its like. one of the best movies ever.

**tim:** hell yeah it is!

[melanie picks up michael,and lets tim sit down before laying michael back down so that hes laying across both of them. hes almost totally asleep at this point.]

**michael:** im gonnaaa...try to stay awake. for ponyo. if i cant,ponk will watch it for me.

**melanie:** has ponk ever seen ponyo before?

**michael:** no,its her first time.

**melanie:** oh,swag,well shes gonna love it.

[gerry comes and sits on the floor,and rests his head against melanies knees.]

**gerry:** everyone,im begging you to shut the fuck up while we watch this,because its fucking  _ ponyo  _ and should not be interrupted.

**melanie:** yeah,yeah,just play the movie,gayboy.

[michael starts crying like,ten minutes in.]

**melanie:** you good??

**michael:** i just...love this movie so much…….

**tim:** [nodding] as you should.

**gerry:** it  _ is  _ a really good movie.

[like fifteen minutes later]

**melanie:** hey,is the banana bread done?

**gerry:** ah,shit--

**tim:** did you forget about it?

**gerry:** maybe???

**tim:** pfft- okay,okay,lets go get it.

[tim shifts michael off of him,and goes into the kitchen with gerry.]

**melanie:** [far away] it better be good or im fucking running away.

**gerry:** you do that.

**tim:** fuck it up,melanie!

**gerry:** okay,okay. bread time.

[gerry grabs it from the oven and sits it on the counter. hell yeah banana bread. tim immediately tries to touch it,and draws his hand back.]

**gerry:** tim,what the fuck?

**tim:** i-- i wanted some…

**gerry:** tim i. i literally just took it out of the oven.

**tim:** and?i want some.

**gerry:** damn. damn,okay. give it a minute,then we can actually get this bread.

**tim:** fuck yeah! …..do you really not stay up this late?

**gerry:** not usually,no. couldnt sleep anyways,though,so i figured it would be fine if you dumbasses came over.

**tim:** its less lonely like this! and we can sleep in,and then we get to personally witness melanie calling elias a whore when he calls her to ask why shes not in yet.

**gerry:** [laughing] she actually does that?

**tim:** oh,yeah,all the time! its funny. ive watched her do it,he gets  _ so  _ mad.

**gerry:** god-- and shes pretty nice to people so long as they arent dicks,so whatever elias has done is  _ bad  _ bad. which. is expected,because hes elias.

**tim:** yeah,i think its mainly just his vibes.

**gerry:** oh absolutely. yknow--

**melanie:** [from the living room] HEY ASSHOLES BRING ME SOME BREAD

**gerry:** IM COMIIIING

[he puts a couple slices on some plates,and goes back into the living room. he hands a plate to melanie,and goes to hand one to michael,but hes still laying down so gerry just puts a piece in his mouth. if he chokes on it like that then so be it.]

**michael:** [muffled] thanks.

[tim wiggles around so that michaels legs are on top of him again,and gerry sits back in the floor,this time with banana bread.]

**gerry:** what part are we at?

**melanie:** i honestly have no idea. like,im kind of lost,but the movie is so pretty that you forget to be confused.

**gerry:** [nodding] yeah,thats just how ghibli is.

**michael:** [muffled,through tears] its so good.

**tim:** its  _ so  _ pretty.

**melanie:** i know,right?okay,okay,everyone shut up and watch.

[about twenty minutes later,michael stands up,gives everyone a kiss on the forehead,and starts gathering up his ferrets in his arms again.]

**tim:** where are you going?

**michael:** sleep.

**melanie:** ...youre literally walking towards the bathroom.

**michael:** yeah. me and my babies are gonna sleep in the bathtub.

**gerry:** you know you dont have to do that,right?

**michael:** oh,yeah,i know! listening to hozier half asleep in the bath hits different though. goodnight,everyone!

**tim:** night!

**melanie:** gnight,have fun i guess.

[he closes the door behind him,and seals the bottom with a towel so his little bastards dont escape.]

**melanie:** alright,you get up on the couch now,gerry.

**gerry:** aaah okay im coming im coming.

[gerry gets up on the couch inbetween melanie and tim. tim presses against his side,laying his head on gerrys shoulder,and melanie lays her head in his lap.]

**melanie:** cuddle time.

**tim:** hell yeah!

**gerry:** hell yeah.

[they stay pressed together like that for the rest of the movie,occasionally shifting a little to be more comfortable. none of them start falling asleep despite how late it is. by the end of the movie,around 4am,theyre all  _ very  _ tired,but refuse to admit it. well. melanie is refusing to,at least.]

**melanie:** alright,assholes. every good sleepover needs truth or dare.

**gerry:** melanie,its four in the morning.

**melanie:** and?

**gerry:** ….fair.

**tim:** understandable.

[theyre still very squished together,just vibing.]

**melanie:** okay,ill go first. gerry,truth or dare?

**gerry:** uh. truth.

**melanie:** who do you like?

[melanies not even looking at him but he can  _ feel  _ her smug grin.]

**gerry:** pass.

**tim:** aww,cmon! i wanna know too!

**melanie:** yeah,ger! tell us!

**gerry:** okay. its mettaton from undertale.

[melanie starts laughing,but nods knowingly]

**melanie:** of course you would.

**tim:** thats valid,honestly! i think i had a crush on him when i first played too.

**gerry:** as you should. also,my turn.  _ melanie _ . truth or dare?

**melanie:** hm. dare.

**gerry:** okay. asshole. bitch. whore. you want a dare?you want a fucking dare,huh?you think youre so funny,huh?well im about to be hilarious. im gonna be so fucking funny. im gonna fucking get you. okay i dare you to text georgie.

**tim:** the what the ghost girl?

**gerry:** yeah.

**melanie:** _ literally  _ fuck you. i only have her number because we collabed once.

**gerry:** only once,and you still like her!

**melanie:** fuck off. what do i text her?

**gerry:** you know that one picture of the frog that says "hey girl" ?

**melanie:** yes??

**gerry:** send that.

**melanie:** gerry,no. shes gonna think im a "hey mamas" lesbian. im not. i would never do that.

**tim:** [teasing] are you scared to talk to your crush?

**melanie:** _ fuck  _ off. i hate it here.

[melanie pulls out her phone,and goes to georgies contact.]

**melanie:** i fucking hate you people.

[she sends the frog picture that says "hey girl". at 4am.]

**melanie:** are you happy?

**gerry:** [smug] yes.

**tim:** im so proud of you! wait,is she-

[georgie saw it. she saw it?at 4am?why is she awake??]

**tim:** oh,she keysmashed.  _ and  _ said hi back.

**gerry:** ah so shes gay.

**melanie:** you didnt already figure that out dumbass?

**gerry:** well i wouldnt know! ive never seen her! i havent listened to her podcast!

**tim:** you should,its good!

**melanie:** [distracted,still texting georgie] yeah. tim,your turn.

**tim:** oooh,okay! melanie,sorry to choose you again,but truth or dare?

**melanie:** dare. truth is for cowards.

**tim:** i dare you to give me a little kiss.

**melanie:** is that literally it??tim,you can just ask.

[she leans over gerry to kiss tim on the cheek.]

**melanie:** my turn. tim,truth or dare?

**tim:** uuuuuhh dare!

**melanie:** you wanna drink ketchup?

**tim:** oh yeah sure!

[they stand up,and start walking to the kitchen.]

**gerry:** [standing up to follow them] what the fuck?why would you do that??

**tim:** it was a dare!!

**gerry:** yeah,but why?

[melanie shrugs]

**melanie:** it might be tasty.

**gerry:** it wont be. its fine on things,but just to drink??thats terrible. youre going to die.

**tim:** ketchup cant kill me!

**gerry:** for now.

**tim:** ominous,thanks!!

[he opens the fridge and grabs a bottle of ketchup,and just. squirts it straight into his mouth.]

**tim:** actually,its kinda good. like,genuinely this is not half bad.

**melanie:** wait,let me try. [she grabs the bottle from him] no,yeah,youre right. thats not as bad i thought it be,like just eating it on its own.

**gerry:** i hate it here. how can you do this to me?in my own house and home?

**melanie:** try some!

**gerry:** no!!absolutely not!!what the fuck!!

**melanie:** coward. next time ill make you drink paint water.

**gerry:** king,i will actually murder you.

**melanie:** thats a price im willing to pay.

**gerry:** youll die?for ketchup??

**melanie:** yes,actually!

**gerry:** i hate it here.

**tim:** as you should,honestly. now.

[he hops up to sit on the counter.]

**tim:** gerry! go!

**gerry:** ah. fuck. uh. tim??

**tim:** truth!!

**gerry:** okay wait give me a minute im bad at these.

**melanie:** [whispering] ask him about his first kiss.

**gerry:** oh?uh,tell us about your first kiss,then.

**tim:** oh so you want a  _ story  _ story. so it was this skater boy-

**melanie:** always a great way to start a story.

**tim:** right! so,this cishet white skater boy because,yknow,closeted baby tim trying to pretend hes cishet! and we only knew each other because our moms were friends. but like,one time,instead of going to the skate park or something,he took his skateboard to the roller skating rink?for some reason???and he tripped and scraped up his knee,so we were like,in the bathrooms getting him a bandaid and shit,and when i leaned down to help he kissed me,and it was kind of sweet!!it was nice!!but also,why the  _ fuck  _ did he think a skating rink bathroom was a good place to kiss me for the first time! what the  _ fuck!  _ tip: i am so fucking mad.

**melanie:** wasnt that like,the last time you guys saw each other too?

**tim:** YEAH. he was moving but i didnt know because our moms got into a fight and my mom didnt tell me,and i didnt even have a phone yet so i couldnt ask him!!like,its fine,i barely knew him,but god!!what!!

**gerry:** [trying not to laugh] that-- he really thought "whats the best place for a first kiss" ,and then chose a skating rink bathroom?and like not only that,but right after he fell and ate shit??

**tim:** yeah!!what the fuck is wrong with straight white skater boys. theyre all like this.

**gerry:** im so proud to say that ive never actually met one.

**tim:** god,i wish that was me.

**melanie:** proud of you,gerry.

**gerry:** thanks.

**tim:** okaaaay my turn. gerry!

**gerry:** fuck,uh. dare.

**tim:** oh swag! dare you to hold my hand.

**melanie:** oooohh,spicy!

**gerry:** shut uuuupp. i-- uugh.

[tim holds his hand out,smiling at gerry. gerry is very flustered already. he grabs tims hand,and holds it very awkwardly.]

**tim:** also,you have to hold my hand for the rest of the game. thats the rules!!

**gerry:** [something thats basically a verbal keysmash] okay. okay cool.

[melanies just sitting there looking at them,grinning.]

**melanie:** okay,my turn. this a dare for all of us. my dare?is to go the fuck to sleep,you guys can stay in here and hold hands but like im so tired. gerry,im sleeping in your bed.

**gerry:** yeah i figured. please leave room for me though.

**melanie:** no i probably will not. goodnight kings,love you,love wins,gay rights,goodnight.

[she walks out of the kitchen,leaving gerry and tim just standing there still holding hands.]

**tim:** should we go to bed too?

**gerry:** i mean- maybe?if you want to?its late,but i dont really mind staying up with you.

**tim:** nah,its fine!!ill try and go to sleep,you need to get some rest.

[he squeezes gerrys hand before letting go and walking towards the living room,planning to crash on the couch.]

**tim:** goodnight!!

**gerry:** [blushing] ...goodnight.

  
  
  


[gerry goes and lays next to melanie after that. shes already asleep when he gets there. he tries to go to sleep,because its almost 5am now,but hes. not having much luck with that. hes still trying,though!]

[after about twenty minutes of trying to fall asleep,he sits up. he figures he could go into the kitchen,if hes quiet enough,and get some more banana bread. it wouldnt do anything,really,but he wants banana bread.]

[he gets out of bed,careful not to wake melanie up,and walks into the kitchen. he cuts a slice of bread for himself,and sits on the floor with his back pressed against the counter to eat it. after he finishes it,about ten minutes later,he hears footsteps.]

**tim:** gerry?what are you doing up?

**gerry:** couldnt sleep,and i wanted some banana bread. what about you?

[tim comes and sits in the floor next to him.]

**tim:** i cant really sleep either. just not tired,you know?

**gerry:** yeah,i get that. is it at least better than staying at the archives?

**tim:** oh,way better. im- heh,im always kinda scared im gonna wake up and see worms all over me when i wake up there. i-i appreciate it! a lot,you letting me stay there! its just. kind of scary!

**gerry:** well,you can always stay over here,if you want to. i really dont mind. i didnt really...think about how scary the archives would be,for you?

**tim:** mm,its fine! its fine there,usually. its just nice staying here. i like having company,and i like hanging out with you.

[gerry totally doesnt blush at that. he totally doesnt get flustered. nope,not him! nope.]

**gerry:** [struggling a little to get words out] i….im glad,if i could. make you more comfortable. i mean it when i say you can always stay here.

**tim:** [smiling] thanks. youre a good boss. [he bumps his shoulder against gerrys] and an even better friend.

**gerry:** i-- [giggling a little] thank you. im-- im glad. thanks.

**tim:** of course!!and hey,if my house wasnt totally worm infested right now,id tell you the same thing. maybe you can hang out at my place once its not full of worms.

**gerry:** hehe- ill have to take you up on that. ...i think that would be pretty nice,actually.

**tim:** yeah?

**gerry:** yeah.

**tim:** well,hopefully,that wont be too far off! those worms are kinda homophobic,maybe if im gay enough theyll leave.

**gerry:** [laughing] no,definitely. [deeper voice,trying to imitate a pastor or something] the power of gay rights compels you.

**tim:** ppffft- thats our plan,then! just be so gay that they leave. perfect.

**gerry:** exactly. this is an amazing plan. were so smart.

**tim:** oh,totally. were like,fucking geniuses.

**gerry:** absolutely. no one does it like us.

[tim is looking at gerry with the fondest smile on his face. gerry isnt looking at him,but can see his face out of the corner of his eye,and hes very flustered.]

**tim:** are you tired yet?

**gerry:** kind of. probably. uh,thanks,for just….sitting here with me.

**tim:** of course! well.

[he starts standing up,and presses a kiss to gerrys cheek.]

**tim:** goodnight.

[gerry just sits there and brings his hand up to his cheek as tim walks back to the couch,his other hand flapping at his side. god he is so gay. he probably should get some sleep too,though.]

**Author's Note:**

> hi ive never written something this long so this was! an experience ldbysghyfds


End file.
